How to Succeed with People (eBook)

Remarkably Easy Ways to Engage, Influence and Motivate Almost Anyone

Paul McGee (Autor)

eBook Download: EPUB

2024 | 2. Auflage
227 Seiten
Capstone (Verlag)
978-1-394-23307-6 (ISBN)

Infos

Take your people skills to the next level with this easy-to-follow, step-by-step guide

Let's face it. If you want any sort of success in life, you're going to have to deal with other people at some point. It's also the only way to make friends, meet new colleagues, and even find your special someone. So, why does dealing with other people seem so difficult sometimes?

In the newly revised second edition of How to Succeed with People: Remarkably easy ways to engage, influence and motivate almost anyone, bestselling author and international keynote speaker Paul McGee delivers yet another exciting and inspiring guide to improving your communication skills and transforming how you interact with others. You'll learn how to get over your dread of social events and create better relationships at work and in life, as well as:

• Strategies for holding people's attention when you talk and how to listen and respond appropriately to what others are saying or doing
• Improve your ability to confront and challenge difficult people in and outside work
• Develop your skills around how to empathise and support people in tough times

A can't-miss guide on how to boost your understanding of people and your success in dealing with them, this book is perfect for young professionals, managers, executives and supervisors. How to Succeed With People will also prove invaluable in helping your relationships outside of work - from dating to parenting, and from motivating others to difficult conversations. With this book, you can have immediate and actionable advice at your fingertips.

Paul MCGee is Capstone's bestselling author of all time. He is the proud creator of the brand SUMO (Shut Up, Move On) and delivers keynote speeches and workshops around the world to global brands such as Virgin, Dyson, Adidas, GSK, and Specsavers.

Textauszug

Benjamin Franklin was many things in life, but lazy wasn't one of them. He lived in the 1700s and, amongst many other things, was a writer, inventor, scientist, and one of the Founding Fathers of the United States.

Amazing what people did with their time before social media, Netflix, and free WiFi.

He's often credited with the following quote:

“In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.”

If he was alive today, I think he would add a third. Change.

Do we really hate change?

There's a common, widely held belief that people don't like change.

Really?

Still travelling to work by horse and using your Nokia mobile phone? (If you are, please be careful not to text and ride.)

The fact is, we're actually quite comfortable with change when…

• – It's our choice
• – We're in control
• – We see the benefits of changing
• – We see the downsides of not changing

Starting a family, moving house, booking a holiday somewhere new, or buying a pet are all examples of when people not only don't resist change, but actually instigate it.

Even when we're not the creators of change, we can still end up embracing it.

Your world and mine changed dramatically in March 2020 with the global pandemic. I made a living from speaking at events – my world centred around being in a room with other people. My business was decimated, and I appreciate this was nothing in comparison with the devastating impact the pandemic had on many people's lives.

After a few weeks I realized the world wasn't going to return to normal any time soon. If my business was going to survive I would need to change and start delivering virtual events. And I had zero experience in doing so. I lacked the expertise, the equipment (who knew lighting was such a big deal?) and, if I'm honest, the confidence. But here's why the dramatic change to how I worked was not that scary.

Firstly, although the change took some adjusting to, ultimately it was my choice, and I was in control of how many events I did and the way I chose to deliver them. (I decided to avoid sharing slides and went old school, using a flipchart instead. I used props, made the sessions interactive using the chat box, and actually grew to really enjoy delivering them.)

I also saw the benefit of changing. My material could help a lot of people, particularly at such a challenging time and, let's be blunt about it, I realized the consequence of not changing: a dramatic loss of income.

Added to that, my work gave me a real sense of purpose and a connection with the outside world. And I genuinely believe not embracing change would have had a hugely detrimental effect on my well‐being.

Over a two‐and‐a‐half‐year period I delivered over 200 virtual events, literally around the world: from Melbourne to Manchester and from Sri Lanka to Iran. All from the cosy confines of my home office in North West England.

Changing wasn't easy, believe me. Mastering technology was a challenge for me (just ask my wife), but those four factors (choice, control, seeing the benefits of change, and seeing the downsides of not changing) all helped chip away at my previous Luddite approach to technology.

Which is just as well, because…

Bite Size Wisdom

The most insecure place to be right now is in an organization that's not changing

Why is change a challenge to people?

OK, so we might not actually hate change as much as we're sometimes led to believe but, let's be honest, it can still be very challenging. Agree?

And clearly that's the case when it's not our choice, we're not in control, we don't see any benefit for ourselves, and fail to see the downsides of not changing.

You see, when it comes to the whole subject of change we experience the following paradox:

Bite Size Wisdom

People have a love/hate relationship with change

And that's why change is complicated.

OK, so having looked at some factors for why people can be comfortable with change, let's take some time to reflect on the reasons why you and the people you live and work with sometimes also resist it.

Five reasons for resistance

1. Change can be seen as a threat.

You and I have something in common with each other – our brains enjoy predictability and certainty. Admittedly not all the time – life would become incredibly boring if that was the case – but in order to function well, predictability and a sense of certainty around many aspects of our lives is important to us as human beings. And although the unknown can be exciting (especially when it's your choice to explore it) it's less appealing when it's thrust upon you.

Now although there is a small percentage of the population who constantly seek out new adventures and could be labeled “adrenaline addicts” (I have a close family member who could fall into this category), generally we all like to feel safe and secure, and we benefit from routines and rituals – including those lovers of the adrenaline rush.

In a nutshell, routines and rituals help us relax, and although we want to avoid getting into a rut, the reality is…

Bite Size Wisdom

Constant uncertainty and unpredictability amplify our anxiety

So, whilst the prospect of change could create opportunities for some people, it could also be a threat to the safe, predictable and comfortable worlds of others.

2. Change can lead to a loss of status.

We all gain a sense of self‐worth from our abilities and achievements. It feels good to be good at something and to be recognized for that fact. There's nothing wrong with that. As a species we are status‐driven. It might seem incredibly shallow to say so, but our perceived status affects how people treat us.

Why is that the case?

Well, according to Will Storr, author of the bestselling book The Status Game, it seems to be a product of our evolution. A perceived higher status of our early ancestors is believed to have meant they got access to better mates, more food, and greater safety for themselves and their offspring. In other words, status was inextricably linked to survival and having more sex.

Luxury brands have a lot to thank our ancient hunter‐gatherer ancestors for.

Perceived status can be achieved in many ways – through what you wear, the car you drive, and the people you hang around with.

And here's where it can play a part in influencing some people's response to change.

You see, status can also be achieved through your knowledge and expertise and your position within an organization (which goes a long way to explaining some people's love of fancy job titles).

But what if a particular change (perhaps as a result of AI) means the skills you possessed to reach a certain position or status in life are no longer necessary – that they're now redundant? Or what about if a particular change means you need the support of someone you perceive as junior to yourself?

Potentially that's a threat to both your esteem and your employability. When you're no longer perceived as the top dog with all the privileges that go with that position and you've seen your status slide, it's unlikely you'll be at the front of the queue enthusiastically embracing the new change.

3. Change can lead to a loss of control.

People don't like to be micro‐managed. That might be a requirement when you're a toddler, but even at an early age you begin to see the signs of children wanting to assert their own independence (which may explain the outfits my daughter wore when she was three).

That's even more the case as adults.

Bite Size Wisdom

Although some people are more compliant than others, deep down there's an inner rebel within all of us

Admittedly, the size of that rebel differs from person to person (if you've got children, you will probably relate to this), and adolescence and alcohol often act as a catalyst to unleash it, but none of us enjoy being constantly told what to do. (Ever seen a sign that says “DO NOT TOUCH” and then felt a strong urge to do so?)

That's why when we feel change is being imposed on us, without any influence or input from ourselves, we can feel a greater desire to kick back against it.

4. A poor relationship with those implementing the change.

Some change is resisted not because of the actual change, but because of who's instigated it.

Bite Size Wisdom

If you don't like a person, it's unlikely you'll like their ideas

If you don't respect those who are implementing the change, your resistance is ramped up. Your inner rebel is awakened. Let's face it, it takes a degree of maturity and humility to admit, “I might not like that person, but I agree with their ideas.”

Resistance in these cases is driven primarily by emotion, not logic. The reality is the change could actually be beneficial to you, but you...

Produkt-Details

• Erscheint lt. Verlag: 22.4.2024
• Sprache: englisch
• Themenwelt: Sachbuch/Ratgeber ► Beruf / Finanzen / Recht / Wirtschaft
• Themenwelt: Wirtschaft ► Betriebswirtschaft / Management
• Schlagworte: building relationships • can I be a people person? • Emotional Intelligence • EQ • how to be sociable • interpersonal skills • Leadership • leadership guide • leadership skills • people person • People Skills • Sociability • Social Skills • Soft Skills
• ISBN-10: 1-394-23307-8 / 1394233078
• ISBN-13: 978-1-394-23307-6 / 9781394233076