Love, Again (eBook)

Eve Pell (Autor)

eBook Download: EPUB

2015 | 1. Auflage
224 Seiten
Random House Publishing Group (Verlag)
978-0-8041-7647-7 (ISBN)

Infos

In Love, Again, Eve Pell beautifully and thoughtfully concludes that life experience adds dimensions to the art of connection--and that we all stand to learn something from unexpected romance.

How do old people meet new loves?

Eve Pell was 68 when she convinced a friend to set her up with Sam Hirabayashi. Ten years her senior, Sam, a fellow runner, was handsome and sweet. Soon Eve and Sam were plunged into a giddy romance that began with a movie date. 'It was crazy,' Pell writes. 'It was wonderful.'

Pell wrote about their romance in a New York Times Modern Love column and received a wave of responses from people who recognized their own stories in hers. This thing, this late-in-life love: It's growing, it's everywhere, and it's transformative.

In staggering numbers, old people are meeting and falling in love--in senior living facilities, in retirement homes, in bars, in grocery stores, on cruise ships, on the Internet--brazenly, quietly, unexpectedly. People once written off as too old for intimacy are having romances, beginning intense affairs once thought to be for the young.

Part memoir, part journey to a new frontier, Love, Again is illuminating and heartwarming. Speaking with poets and artists, a retired nurse and a retired coach, environmentalists, philanthropists, and teachers--couples whose partners' ages range from 61 to 96--Pell reports on their relationships, from saying hello to knowing they'd found the one, from blending routines and traditions to overcoming judgements and challenges. These widows, widowers, divorces, and never-marrieds open up about old love versus young, the thrill of sex, and the looming shadow of mortality.

At the core of this book is wisdom: what we all can learn from the experience, regardless of age.

Fall in love with who someone is now--not who they someday might be.

Always be honest, but don't feel pressure to share everything.

And most of all: The heart can continue to expand.

Advance praise for Love, Again

'After several disappointing marriages and relationships, Eve Pell, in her seventh decade, dared to love again. Sam Hirabayashi, whom she loved and lost, was the inspiration for this book. She decided to seek out others who had found love in their final years. Her career as an investigative reporter served her in discovering such couples and learning their stories, which, along with her own love story, she imparts with fluency and zest. Love, Again is a joy to read, full of humor and heart and sweet collective wisdom, a book for all ages.'--Susan Trott, author of the Holy Man Trilogy

'I remarried at 75 and have followed one hundred marriages from age 50 on. Eve Pell knows what she is talking about. Her book is touching, eye-opening, inspiring, and wise. In addition, it is beautifully written.'--George E. Vaillant, M.D., author of Triumphs of Experience: The Men of the Harvard Grant Study

'In this inspiring exploration of fifteen late-in-life romances, Eve Pell illustrates the human appetite and capacity for romantic love at any age. As these men and women--widowed and divorced, gay and straight--share their stories of forging deep connections in their 60s, 70s, 80s, and, yes, 90s, they deliver a heartwarming message: We are never too old for new love.'--Jill Smolowe, author of Four Funerals and a Wedding: Resilience in a Time of Grief

From the Hardcover edition.

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In Love, Again, Eve Pell beautifully and thoughtfully concludes that life experience adds dimensions to the art of connection—and that we all stand to learn something from unexpected romance.   How do old people meet new loves?   Eve Pell was 68 when she convinced a friend to set her up with Sam Hirabayashi. Ten years her senior, Sam, a fellow runner, was handsome and sweet. Soon Eve and Sam were plunged into a giddy romance that began with a movie date. “It was crazy,” Pell writes. “It was wonderful.”   Pell wrote about their romance in a New York Times Modern Love column and received a wave of responses from people who recognized their own stories in hers. This thing, this late-in-life love: It’s growing, it’s everywhere, and it’s transformative.   In staggering numbers, old people are meeting and falling in love—in senior living facilities, in retirement homes, in bars, in grocery stores, on cruise ships, on the Internet—brazenly, quietly, unexpectedly. People once written off as too old for intimacy are having romances, beginning intense affairs once thought to be for the young.   Part memoir, part journey to a new frontier, Love, Again is illuminating and heartwarming. Speaking with poets and artists, a retired nurse and a retired coach, environmentalists, philanthropists, and teachers—couples whose partners’ ages range from 61 to 96—Pell reports on their relationships, from saying hello to knowing they’d found the one, from blending routines and traditions to overcoming judgments and challenges. These widows, widowers, divorcés, and never-marrieds open up about old love versus young, the thrill of sex, and the looming shadow of mortality.   At the core of this book is wisdom: what we all can learn from the experience, regardless of age.   • Fall in love with who someone is now—not who they someday might be. • Always be honest, but don’t feel pressure to share everything. • And most of all: The heart can continue to expand.   Advance praise for Love, Again  “A heartwarming, eye-opening, life-affirming journey to the final frontier of romance, this is a beautiful book about the possibility of late-in-life love and the life-changing lessons we all can learn from those who have been lucky enough to find it.”—Katie Couric“Eve Pell’s career as an investigative reporter served her in discovering such couples and learning their stories, which, along with her own love story, she imparts with fluency and zest. Love, Again is a joy to read, full of humor and heart and sweet collective wisdom, a book for all ages.”—Susan Trott, author of the Holy Man Trilogy   “I remarried at 75 and have followed one hundred marriages from age 50 on. Eve Pell knows what she is talking about. Her book is touching, eye-opening, inspiring, and wise. In addition, it is beautifully written.”—George E. Vaillant, M.D., author of Triumphs of Experience: The Men of the Harvard Grant Study   “In this inspiring exploration of fifteen late-in-life romances, Eve Pell illustrates the human appetite and capacity for romantic love at any age. As these men and women—widowed and divorced, gay and straight—share their stories of forging deep connections in their 60s, 70s, 80s, and, yes, 90s, they deliver a heartwarming message: We are never too old for new love.”—Jill Smolowe, author of Four Funerals and a Wedding: Resilience in a Time of Grief

Textauszug

Start Here

We turn not older with years, but newer every day.

--Emily Dickinson

Sam and Me

Pursuit

How do old people meet new loves? Here's how it happened for me: I schemed.

I never was any good at love, or maybe I was just bad at finding the right man. In 2004, at the age of 67, I broke off the most recent 'this isn't working' relationship. I'd had two husbands and a few not-husbands along the way and was once again single.

I had delightful children, grandchildren, and friends, fulfilling work as a writer, and a sort of second career as a nationally ranked senior runner. I lived in a sweet if somewhat run-down little cottage in Mill Valley, north of San Francisco. Over the years I had learned--or had been forced to learn--how to live on my own. But though I knew how to manage as a single woman (keep in touch with your friends and family, exercise regularly, work in your garden, see a therapist when your need for support is more than friends should be subjected to), I liked life better when I was part of a couple.

So, once I was over the breakup, I was on the hunt. I looked around for boyfriend candidates. I thought of two possibilities. One was a charming younger man I'd met while hiking in the Sierras. We had gone out a few times, and I liked him. But on the most recent date, he'd let me know that he was involved in a long-term relationship with a woman who lived in New York and that, though the relationship was problematic (hence, I suppose, his interest in me), he was not going to leave it. Even I knew that was a nonstarter.

I had met the other one through running, but our acquaintance was minimal. I knew that Sam Hirabayashi was a widower, ten years older than I, and most likely single.

He was strikingly handsome, with a sweet smile, and very easy to talk to. He'd become something of an icon in the running community because, seemingly impervious to age, he routinely bested far younger competitors in races--and also because of his extraordinarily good nature. Even if he'd had one training run in the morning, followed by breakfast with his teammates, he would cheerfully do track workouts the same evening with other runners and go out to dinner afterward.

I wanted to get to know him better. But how? He was older and probably quite proper--not the kind of guy I could imagine going up to and saying, 'You're cute. I like you. Let's go out sometime.'

I devised a plan. Janet, a friend we had in common, had a small movie theater in her house, she often invited me to parties. I called her. 'This is very seventh grade,' I began. 'But I'd like you to invite Sam to one of your screenings. I'll come to any movie he's coming to.' She laughed and agreed.

Soon after, she called. 'He's coming on Thursday.'

'I'll be there,' I said.

There were eight or ten of us that evening. After the movie, as we were all standing around and chatting, someone mentioned The Motorcycle Diaries, a new film about Che Guevara. 'I'd like to see that,' I said.

'I would too,' said Sam. There was a short pause, and I held my breath. He looked at me. 'Would you like to go?'

Suppressing the urge to high-five Janet, I said yes. We set a date for the following week, he'd meet me at the theater. It was December 10--an anniversary he would always remember. I saw him there as I drove up, waiting for me, standing in front of the theater. But our movie was sold out.

What to do? We looked at what else was playing (thank goodness for multiplexes) and chose Sideways. I have a vague memory of something about men and wine but a sharp memory of sitting next to Sam. And when Sideways was over, we decided...

Produkt-Details

• Erscheint lt. Verlag: 27.1.2015
• Sprache: englisch
• Themenwelt: Literatur ► Biografien / Erfahrungsberichte
• Themenwelt: Sachbuch/Ratgeber
• ISBN-10: 0-8041-7647-7 / 0804176477
• ISBN-13: 978-0-8041-7647-7 / 9780804176477