Falling Apart (eBook)

Rasheed Jamal (Autor)

eBook Download: EPUB

2021 | 1. Auflage
187 Seiten
Bookbaby (Verlag)
978-1-0983-9175-1 (ISBN)

Infos

Secrets are easy to keep. The question is, can you handle everything that comes with the truth? All Arizona ever wanted was a real man. She finds him in JR, fresh out of prison after serving a 20 year sentence. They build a relationship, only to have devastating secrets chip away at the foundation they have created. Arizona's secret is so explosive that she's willing to do anything to maintain the lie that is her love life. Would you kill to keep the love of your life?

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Arizona and JR. Despite a big age difference, they fall in love while making plans for their future. A future which includes children, marriage, and friendship. Before long, Arizona learns a secret that threatens to tear at the fabric of their relationship. Doing all she can to maintain her life while holding on to the secret sends her into a deep spiral that she struggles to get out of. Feeling backed into a corner, Arizona does all she can to keep her life together. Her love for JR is so strong that she will go to extreme lengths to them together.

Textauszug

Part 2

Arizona

I love my life right now. I’m young, I’m part owner of a successful take out restaurant, and I’m in love with the man of my dreams. Earlier today, I went to the doctor and found out I was pregnant with JR’s baby.

Today is also his birthday. I want to surprise him with the news along with the present I got him. But, I’m scared. Now don’t get me wrong, because JR is a good man. I just wonder how he’ll take the news since it impacts his life too.

“Happy Birthday babe.” I tell him.

“What is this?” He asks, opening the present.

“Just open it.”

“Okay.” He said, pulling out the chain and medallion. “Now all I need is six more of these and some nappy chest hair and I’ll be sumpt’n like a pimp.”

“I got one more for you.” I said, laughing.

In that one second, I had decided to tell him. I realized that I must really love him if I laughed at his corny joke.

“What is this, some more of money you done spent up?”

“Open it.” I said, punching his arm.

“You know that’s domestic violence right?”

JR took one look at my face and knew that I needed him to open the box. I watched him tear at the wrapping like it was Christmas. I think I was even more excited than he was. Of course I was. I was pregnant for the first time. For a second I thought he might’ve been mad because the whole smile dropped from his face. I guess he must have been taking it all in.

“Shit girl, you pregnant? Damn!”

What’s the matter babe, you happy right?” I asked him.

“Hell yeah I’m happy. I always wanted kids.”

***

JR

“Hell yeah I’m happy. I always wanted kids.” I said

Kids, a mini me. I couldn't wait for her to have this baby. Maybe if my old bitch had hung around while I was locked up, I would’ve tried to spit a baby or two up in her. She had made sure that wouldn’t happen though.

“So how you feel?” She asked me. “You don’t think you too old, do you?”

“Fuck how old I am. I just want a seed to carry on my name.”

“I’m just saying, don’t tell my baby that you can’t play catch wit’ him when he fifteen and you sixty.”

“So you want a boy then? You said he.”

“Huh?”

“You said he. So that means you want a boy right?”

“I’ll take a boy.” She said after thinking. “Hopefully he’ll be just like his daddy.”

Just like his daddy. Those were the words that had haunted me my whole life. When I first got into the dope game, that’s what my family told me. Even when I was running through all the toss-ups in school, the words echoed in my head.

“We should get married.” I said.

“Married? You wanna’ marry me?”

“Yeah, why not? I always said if I had kids I wanted a wife, not a baby mama.”

“Damn, you only wanna’ marry me ‘cuz I’m pregnant?” She asked, angrily.

“Nah, I wanna’ marry you ‘cuz I love you. Plus, I don’t want my kids growing up wit’out a father.”

“Aww, you love me babe?” She asked, happily.

Yeah, that’s right, I said I love her. That’s what happens to dudes that done spent hella’ time in the pen. He fall in love with the first good pussy bitch that comes along.

“Yeah I love you.” I told her. “So you ready to get married or what?”

“Damn, can you ask me better than that?”

“What you want, a nigga’ to get down on his knees or sumpt’n?

***

Arizona

Damn, he shocked me when he got down on his knees and pulled out that ring. It was supposed to be his birthday, but I was the one getting surprised. He must have had this planned beforehand.

“Will you marry me?” He asked, holding up the ring.

I dropped to my knees with him. I couldn’t believe it, in the short period of less than a year, I was pregnant and about to be married.

“Can we have a big wedding?” I ask him.

“What’s a big wedding?”

“I want sumpt’n in a church, wit’ a pastor and a white dress.”

“I thought white dresses was for virgins?” He said, jokingly.

“I would still be a virgin if you hadn’t come along, so I want a white dress.”

I got quiet and thought about how much I wanted my mother to be there when I got married. Even though she had abandoned me and left me to fend for myself, I still wanted her to be a part of it. It was the dream of every little girl in the world.

“What’s the matter?” JR asked me.

“I was thinking about my mother. I wish I knew where she was.” I answered.

“You want her to see you get married?”

“I just want her to be in my life period, especially wit’ me having a baby. Who wouldn’t want to be a grandparent?”

I wanted to discuss it with him further, but the knock at the door interrupted my thoughts. I got up to answer the door. It was my friend Trey. JR didn’t deal with anybody in his family but his cousin. He didn’t come around too often, only to beg for more money. So we didn’t have company that often.

“Hey girl.” I said, opening the door.

“Did you tell him?” She asked, trying to whisper.

“Yeah I told him.”

“Congratulations daddy.” She said, sashaying through the door.

Right away I didn’t like what she had on when she took off her coat. She was my best friend though, so I trusted her. Besides, I knew JR loved me, and no hoochie in a mini skirt could take the place of that.

“How does it feel knowing you finna’ be a daddy?”

“I’m good wit’ it.” JR answered.

“Y’all do know of course that I gotta’ be the godmama right?”

Somehow she was reminding me of Jackee at that moment. The tight clothes, the whiny voice. It was all irking my nerves, just like the real thing.

“I did bring some champagne to celebrate.” She said, holding up a gold bottle. “ But you can’t have none girlfriend.”

“Shit, you coulda’ just brought me a bottle of Remy.” JR said.

“Not tonight. We celebrating in style. Only the best for my girl. Ace of Spades!”

“Ace of Spades, what’s that?” JR asked.

“This that Jay-Z shit. All the rappers be drinking this.They be all in the videos wit’ bottles in both hands.” She said, juiced.

***

JR

I didn’t like her the first time I laid eyes on her, and I don’t like her now. The only reason I tolerate her is because she ‘Zona’s friend. Back in the day we had names for bitches like her. Toss-ups, car hops, gold diggers, and late night creeps. Believe me, I see the way she eye-balling the front of my slacks, trying to x-ray vision my shit. I also know as soon as she got the chance, she was going to test the waters.

“Where the glasses at girl?” she asked Arizona.

As ‘Zona went to go get the glasses, Trey had me feeling like a kid at school about to get beat up by the bully. Don’t get me wrong though, I’m a man just like any other. Which is why I had to be cool around this bitch. She wasn’t ugly by no means, plus she had a banging body. The kind that could tempt a nigga’ to do some dumb shit.

“Have you thought of any names yet?” She asked, while cocking her legs for my benefit.

“Nah. I figure we can wait ‘til it’s born.”

“Oh, playing it safe huh?” She said, with a smirk.

And I just knew that that was somehow aimed at me too. I took one last peek at her open legs before ‘Zona came back in with the glasses. Trey gave me another smirk when she saw me looking, then closed her legs back.

***

“Damn, this drink is running right through me.” Arizona said.

“That’s why I said you didn’t need to be drinking.” Trey said.

“Shut up girl. I wanted to kick it one last time before I had my baby. I’m going to the bathroom.”

When she closed the door, Trey got up and plopped down on the couch next to me. She was practically in my lap. I wanted to see where she was trying to take it.

“You know,” She whispered. “In a few months she gon’ be too big to handle all this. You gon’ need somewhere to put it.”

When she said all this, she put her hand on my dick and started rubbing it back and forth. This is why ‘Zona wasn’t supposed to be running her mouth about the size of my dick. I’m a man, like I said. And...

Produkt-Details

• Erscheint lt. Verlag: 24.7.2021
• Sprache: englisch
• Themenwelt: Literatur ► Lyrik / Dramatik ► Dramatik / Theater
• ISBN-10: 1-0983-9175-6 / 1098391756
• ISBN-13: 978-1-0983-9175-1 / 9781098391751