Grief Recovery Handbook, 20th Anniversary Expanded Edition (eBook)

The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death, Divorce, and Other Losses including Health, Career, and Faith

Russell Friedman, John W. James (Autoren)

eBook Download: EPUB

2009 | 1. Auflage
240 Seiten
Harpercollins (Verlag)
978-0-06-197290-4 (ISBN)

Infos

Newly updated and expanded to commemorate its twentieth anniversary--this classic resource helps people complete the grieving process and move toward recovery and happiness.

Incomplete recovery from grief can have a lifelong negative effect on the capacity for happiness. Drawing from their own histories as well as from others', the authors illustrate how it is possible to recover from grief and regain energy and spontaneity. Based on a proven program, The Grief Recovery Handbook offers grievers the specific actions needed to move beyond loss. New material in this edition includes guidance for dealing with:

Loss of faith

Loss of career and financial issues

Loss of health

Growing up in an alcoholic or dysfunctional home

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Updated to commemorate its 20th anniversary, this classic resource further explores the effects of grief and sheds new light on how to begin to take effective actions to complete the grieving process and work towards recovery and happiness.Incomplete recovery from grief can have a lifelong negative effect on the capacity for happiness. Drawing from their own histories as well as from others', the authors illustrate how it is possible to recover from grief and regain energy and spontaneity. Based on a proven program, The Grief Recovery Handbook offers grievers the specific actions needed to move beyond loss. New material in this edition includes guidance for dealing with:* Loss of faith* Loss of career and financial issues* Loss of health* Growing up in an alcoholic or dysfunctional homeThe Grief Recovery Handbook is a groundbreaking, classic handbook that everyone should have in their library. This book is required for all my classes. The more I use this book, the more I believe that unresolved grief is the major underlying issue in most peoples lives. It is the only work of its kind that I know of that outlines the problem and provides the solution.Bernard McGrane, Ph.D., Professor of Sociology, Chapman University

Textauszug

Grief is the normal and natural reaction to loss of any kind. Therefore, the feelings you are having are also normal and natural for you. The problem is that we have all been socialized to believe that these feelings are abnormal and unnatural.

While grief is normal and natural, and clearly the most powerful of all emotions, it is also the most neglected and misunderstood experience, often by both the grievers and those around them.

Grief is the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a -familiar pattern of behavior. What do we mean by conflicting feelings? Let us explain by example. When someone you love dies after suffering a long illness, you may feel a sense of relief that your loved one's suffering is over. That is a positive feeling, even though it is associated with a death. At the same time, you may realize that you can no longer see or touch that person. This may be very painful for you. These conflicting feelings, relief and pain, are totally normal in response to death.

What about divorce? Are there conflicting feelings too? Yes. You may feel a genuine sense of freedom now that the battles are over. That is a positive feeling. At the same time, you may be afraid that you will never 'find someone as beautiful/as good a provider.' These conflicting feelings, freedom and fear, are also natural responses to loss.

All relationships have aspects of familiarity whether they are romantic, social, familial, or business. What other losses cause similar conflicting feelings? While death and divorce are obvious, many other loss experiences have been identified that can produce grief. Among them are:

Death of a pet

Moving

Starting school

Death of a former spouse

Marriage

Graduation

End of addictions

Major health changes

Retirement

Financial changes-positive or negative

Holidays

Legal problems

Empty nest

Often these common life experiences are not seen as grieving events. We grieve for the loss of all relationships we deem significant - which are thus also emotional.

If the major loss events in your life have not been associated with death, do not put this book down.

After twenty years of working with grievers, we have identified several other losses, including loss of trust, loss of safety, and loss of control of one's body (physical or sexual abuse). Society still does not recognize these losses as grief issues.

Loss-of-trust events are experienced by almost everyone and can have a major, lifelong negative impact. You may have experienced a loss of trust in a parent, a loss of trust in God, or a loss of trust in any other relationship. Is loss of trust a grief issue? The answer is yes. And the problem of dealing with the grief it causes remains the same. Grief is normal and natural, but we have been ill prepared to deal with it. Grief is about a broken heart, not a broken brain. All efforts to heal the heart with the head fail because the head is the wrong tool for the job. It's like trying to paint with a hammer-it only makes a mess.

Almost all intellectual comments are preceded by the phrase, 'Don't feel bad.' In 1977, when John's infant son died, a well-meaning friend said, 'Don't feel bad-you can have other children.' The intellectually accurate statement that John had the physical capability to have other children was not only irrelevant, it was unintentionally abusive, because it belittled his natural and normal emotions. John felt bad, his heart was broken.

When Russell and his first wife divorced, he was devastated. A friend said, 'Don't feel bad-you'll do better next time.' Most of the comments that grievers hear following a loss, while intellectually accurate, are...

Produkt-Details

• Erscheint lt. Verlag: 6.10.2009
• Sprache: englisch
• Themenwelt: Sachbuch/Ratgeber ► Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie ► Lebenshilfe / Lebensführung
• Themenwelt: Sachbuch/Ratgeber ► Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie ► Psychologie
• Themenwelt: Geisteswissenschaften ► Psychologie ► Trennung / Trauer
• ISBN-10: 0-06-197290-8 / 0061972908
• ISBN-13: 978-0-06-197290-4 / 9780061972904